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Okay... Wees finally in zeeba house... Whuh we do now?
KEEL ZEEBA
Zeeba no here, Larry.
KEEL BOB!
Dis last time YOU geet peegyback ride.
Hey, me juss brainstorming, Bob.

HEY, STEPH, CAN I ASK YOU SOMETHING?
SURE, PIG... ANYTHING.
I DON'T NORMALLY DO THIS, BUT I SORTA THOUGHT OF A NEW CHARACTER FOR THE STRIP AND I WANTED TO SEE IF YOU LIKED IT.
HEY, THAT'S GREAT, PIG. I CAN ALWAYS USE A NEW CHARACTER. WHO IS IT?
WELL, SEE, HE'S A SUPERHERO... AND HE'S VERY TOUGH.
OH, YEAH? LIKE A REAL TOUGH GUY?
OHH, YEAH. AND HE'S VERY SOPHISTICATED AND HANDSOME. AND WOMEN LOVE HIM.
A LADIES MAN, HUH?... WHAT'S HIS NAME?
GYM SOCK NOSE GUY.
I THINK SOMEONE FAR FAR AWAY IS CRAVING FOR HELP.
IT'S A GYM! IT'S A SOCK! IT'S GYM SOCK NOSE GUY!

YOU GOTTA LET ME STAY HERE, RAT. THE CROWS HAVE TAKEN OVER MY HOUSE. I HAVE NOWHERE TO LIVE...C'MON...WHAT ARE FRIENDS FOR?
YOU'VE STUMPED ME.
IT'S NOT A QUIZ, RAT! I'M JUST ASKING YOU FOR A FAVOR!
DOING FAVORS FOR FRIENDS IS LIKE GIVING BON BONS TO FAT PEOPLE. THEY JUST WANT MORE.
YOU'RE GONNA DO NOTHING AND JUST LET ME SLEEP ON THE STREET?
THAT SOUNDS HARSH. I'LL DRIVE BY AND WAVE.
OH, JOY.
WAIT...I'M BUSY LATER. LET ME GIVE IT TO YOU NOW.

RAT! THANK GOD YOU'RE HOME. I NEED A PLACE TO STAY... THE CROWS FLEW THROUGH A SKYLIGHT INTO MY HOUSE.
WHERE YOU LOOKING TO STAY?
I WAS HOPING HERE.
OH. NEW, THIS IS THE DIKEMBE MUTOMBO FINGER WAG... IT MEANS, "GET THAT WEAK CRAP OUT OF HERE."
IS THAT A NO?
AND THIS IS THE RAT HIGH FIVE. IT MEANS, "WHOA, YOU'RE NOT AS DUMB AS YOU LOOK."
HEY. DON'T LEAVE ME HANGING.

CREEEEAK
CRAAAAAACK
CREEEEEEEK
CRACK
CRASH
Me tole you skylight have weight leemit.

HEY, ZEBRA, WHAT HAPPENED IN HERE? I WAS READING AND EVERYTHING WENT DARK.
I'M LATE FOR SOMETHING.

DUDE... WHAT'S WITH THE BAG ON YOUR HEAD?
PRIVACY. I'M TRYING TO PRESERVE A LITTLE OF IT.
THAT'S STUPID. I'VE SEEN YOU BEFORE.
YEAH, WELL MAYBE YOU'RE NOT THE REASON.
Censorsheep!!
Censorsheep!!

HEY THERE, ZEBRA...
I HEARD YOU GOT A NEW SKYLIGHT...
CAN I COME IN AND SEE IT?
SURE, PIG.
BUT I'M GETTING RID OF IT.
GETTING RID OF IT? WHY??
Is like very own 'Food Channel.'
No drool on screen, Bob.

HEY, RAT. IT'S ME, GOAT.
AHHH...WHAT'S YOUR STUPID FACE DOING ON PIG'S NEW COMPUTER?
IT'S 'CHAT'...IT'S A VIDEO-PHONE.
WHY WOULD I WANT TO SEE YOUR DUMB FACE WHEN WE TALK? I DON'T EVEN WANT TO HEAR YOUR VOICE.
AW, DON'T BE SUCH A MISANTHROPE...HEY, WHAT KIND OF BEER IS THAT?
WHAT KIND OF—YOU CAN SEE ME?
OF COURSE I CAN! IT'S A VIDEOPHONE.
AAAUUUGH!!! GET OUT OF MY @#$%& HOUSE!!
HEY HEY HEY...CALM DOWN...JUST TERMINATE THE CALL IF YOU DON'T—
IT BROKE.

HEY, RAT... DID YOU SEE FRED, MY NEW WALKING STICK INSECT? HE LOOKS EXACTLY LIKE THE BRANCHES AROUND HIM.
WHOA. THAT’S WEIRD, DUDE.
OH. WAIT A MINUTE... HEE HEE HEE... THAT’S JUST A STICK I GAVE YOU.
HEH HEH... YEAH, YOU’RE RIGHT.
...NO... NO... THAT IS FRED.
WAS FRED.
Medic.

ALRIGHT, PIG... YOU READY TO TRY THE VIDEO PHONE?
YEAH, LEMME JUST
FIND WHERE THE
CAMERA IS, SO I
CAN GET MY FACE
IN FRONT OF IT...
LET'S SEE, IS THAT
IT OVER —
AAAAHHHH
... THERE?
IN THE MONITOR,
PIG... IT'S IN THE
MONITOR.

WHAT DO YOU GOT THERE, RAT?
IT'S TUBEY, MY CYLINDRICAL PILLOW ACQUAINTANCE.
HEY! THAT'S JUST LIKE ME AND MY FAVORITE STUFFED ANIMAL, MR. PITTERS! MAYBE TUBEY AND MR. PITTERS CAN BE BEST BUDDIES AND--
KA-THUNK
WE'RE WORKING ON TUBEY'S SOCIAL SKILLS.

ALRIGHT, YOU DUMB PIG. SINCE YOU HAD SO MUCH TROUBLE FINDING US AN ACCOUNTANT, I WENT OUT AND HIRED OUR NEIGHBOR ALAN. HE'S SMART. HE'S HONEST. AND HE HAS THIRTY YEARS' EXPERIENCE AS AN ACCOUNTANT.
OH, YEAH? ANY CATCH?
HE'S A LITTLE BURNED OUT.
YAAAAAY... MORE NUMBERS.

I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU FINALLY FOUND US AN ACCOUNTANT.
YEAH. HIS NAME IS ANDY THE AARDVARK. HE'S 'POSED TO BE A WHIZ WITH NUMBERS.
WHAT'S THE CATCH?
NO CATCH. WE JUST STOP BY AND TALK TO HIM ABOUT OUR TAXES.
Z Z Z Z Z Z Z Z Z Z
I FORGOT HE'S NOCTURNAL.

RAT, THIS IS BEANIE THE BEAR. HE'S AN ACCOUNTANT. I TOLD HIM WE NEEDED SOMEONE TO DO OUR TAXES AND HE SAID HE COULD DO IT.
OH, YEAH? WHAT ARE YOUR STRENGTHS?
I'M HONEST.
I'M DILIGENT.
I'M GOOD WITH NUMBERS.
ANY DRAWBACKS?
I'M ASLEEP FROM NOVEMBER THROUGH MARCH.
BUT HE REALLY PICKS IT UP POST-HIBERNATION.

WHAT AM I DOING?
PUTTING UP MY HOMEMADE TEXAS A & M AGGIES FLAG.
SINCE WHEN ARE YOU AN AGGIES FAN?
SINCE I SAW THEIR LOGO ON SOMETHING AND THOUGHT IT WAS AN A.T.M. MACHINE. NOW I JUST LIKE THE WAY IT LOOKS.
YEAH, WELL, THEIR COLORS ARE MAROON AND WHITE, NOT GREEN. SO TAKE IT DOWN BEFORE SOME AGGIE FAN THINKS YOU'RE A MORON.
OH, I DIDN'T KNOW. CAN I PUT UP MY MIA HAMM POSTER INSTEAD?
DUDE, SHE HASN'T PLAYED IN YEARS.
SO YOU DON'T KNOW THIS EITHER?
NO, BUT SHE'S SO GREAT. AND IT'S NOT A FLAG. I MEAN, HOW CAN YOU NOT LIKE THEM?
BECAUSE BUT WHY NOT?
BECAUSE I DO NOT LIKE GREEN AGS AND HAMM!!!
ONE FISH, TWO FISH, RED FISH, DEAD FISH.

RAT'S PRACTICING NOT BLINKING.
WHY?
IT MAKES HIS EYES TEAR UP.
WHY WOULD HE WANT THAT?
I KNOW IT'S JUST A FIRST DATE, BUT I MUST SAY, YOUR SENSITIVITY IS VERY ATTRACTIVE.
I FEEL TOO MUCH.

THANKS FOR HELPING ME MAKE A MONTHLY BUDGET, GOAT... I'M TERRIBLE WITH FINANCES.
NO PROBLEM, PIG. I THINK IT'LL BE EASIER FOR YOU IF WE REPRESENT THINGS WITH GRAPHS.
OH, ME TOO. MUCH EASIER.
ALRIGHT, NOW, YOU SEE THAT BIG SLICE I'VE TAKEN OUT OF YOUR MONTHLY INCOME? I'D LIKE YOU TO TAKE THIS PEN AND WRITE UP THERE WHAT YOU THINK IT REPRESENTS.
NO.
SEE, THERE GOES MY MONEY...
WOCKA WOCKA WOCKA WOCKA

WHAT HAPPENED TO PIG'S ATTEMPT TO PICK UP WOMEN WITH HIS "BRILLO" PAD WIG?
DIDN'T WORK. SO NOW HE'S GONE BACK TO HIS OLD GIRLFRIEND, PIGITA.
GEEZ, AFTER ALL THAT, WHAT'D SHE WANT HIM BACK FOR?
SCRUB
SCRUB
SCRUB
SCRUB

BAD NEWS, SIR...IN MY NEVER-ENDING WAR AGAINST RUDE NEIGHBORS, I SOMETIMES HAVE TROUBLE TELLING THE FRIENDLY HOUSES FROM THE UNFRIENDLY ONES.
OH, NO, SO WHAT DO YOU DO?
I SHOOT THEM ALL.
SUDDENLY, I FEEL LIKE DENNIS THE MENACE.

EXCUSE ME, MA'AM, BUT I COULDN'T HELP NOTICE YOU'RE STARING AT MY LUXURIOUS MANE. IF YOU'RE FINDING IT IRRESISTIBLE, FEEL FREE TO HUG ME AND TAKE ME HOME WITH YOU.
WHY WOULD I TAKE SOMEONE HOME WITH ME WHO HAS 'BRILLO' PADS STUCK TO HIS HEAD?
BECAUSE AFTER WE'RE DONE HUGGING, YOU CAN TURN ME UPSIDE DOWN AND CLEAN YOUR SINK.
IT'S AN ADDED FEATURE.

WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
IT'S MY NEW LOOK. I'M "MACHO HAIRY PIG." I DID IT SO THE LADIES WILL FIND ME IRRESISTIBLY HUGGABLE.
THAT'S NOT HAIR. YOU JUST STUCK A BOX'S WORTH OF 'BRILLO' PADS TO YOUR HEAD.
SO MUCH FOR SAVING MONEY ON HAIR PLUGS.

Zeeba!
WHAT?
Save environment!
WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?
PUT BOB EEN YOUR HOUSE. BE FRIEND TO BOB.
WHAT'S BOB HAVE TO DO WITH SAVING THE ENVIRONMENT?
You be Bob friend. Bob green-friendly.
THAT IS NOT WHAT 'GREEN-
WHOA WHOA WHOA. Calm you face down. Have cup o' coffee.
IS THAT A POLYSTYRENE FOAM CUP?
Who know? Best ees use anyt'ing 'cause when we done, we t'rew on ground. Wind blow away.
I'M LEAVING NOW.
Hey, lary, look... Stoopid tree stop 'ere.
Here. Chap t'ree down.

OH, GREAT... WHAT ARE YOU DOING NOW, YOU DUMB PIG? SELLING PEOPLE COMPLIMENTS FOR A BUCK?
NO, I'M BUYING! I GIVE YOU A DOLLAR, SEE, AND YOU SAY SOMETHING NICE ABOUT ME!
A DOLLAR? OH, YOU SAD, LONELY, HOMELY, PATHETIC LARDBUTT.
I'D LIKE A REFUND.

WHY MUST A SMART GUY LIKE ME LIVE IN A WORLD FILLED WITH IDIOTS?
DON'T YOU WORRY ABOUT OFFENDING PEOPLE WHEN YOU SAY STUFF LIKE THAT? AFTER ALL, THIS COMIC IS SEEN BY MILLIONS OF NEWSPAPER READERS.
ARE YOU NUTS? YOU CAN ALWAYS MAKE FUN OF IDIOTS, BECAUSE NO ONE THINKS THEY ARE AN IDIOT... I MEAN, CAN YOU IMAGINE SOME GUY WRITING A LETTER TO THE EDITOR THAT BEGINS... "DEAR SIR, AS AN IDIOT, I WAS GREATLY OFFENDED BY..."
...the comic strip "Pearls Before Swine."